Tuesday, September 21, 2021

The never-ending confusion of grabbing a seat in a car!! ЁЯЪЧ

Have you (addressed to women only) ever wondered where to sit while traveling by car with a male friend or colleague? I have. Several times. Before & after marriage. Till date. This might sound very silly and insignificant, but a woman out there could relate themselves to this never-ending confusion.

Once three of us - a male and two females, where one female was married at that time - were out for lunch together by car during our days of research. It becomes an unwritten rule that a married woman wouldn't occupy the front passenger seat with any male except their close family members. When she insisted that I take that seat to avoid making our male friend look like our driverЁЯШЖ, the colleague-friend said a stern 'no.' Though that was quite insulting to me then ЁЯШЭ, it made me wonder what would go wrong if a male and a female sit in the front together. But when two males and a female travel together, be it for personal or professional reason, the latter is pushed to the back passenger seat - no matter which two are closer friends or colleagues. It is also an unwritten rule (may be there is a written rule ЁЯШа) that whenever male persons are there, they invariably take the front passenger seat!

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Does it depend on the common perception that the male-female duo would be couples or likely to become one; or a sort of discomfort to use gears while driving; or the driver-friend-colleague's fear that he would be seen indifferent; or movies that mostly portray such couples getting physically intimate; or a myth that man to man conversation is easier; or it is merely a status-quo. It could be one or all of these or something else. No clue!

To some extent, this behaviour is justifiable in case of rural parts of India or Tamil Nadu. But in urban parts where we 'claim' to be progressive in many fronts and 'scream' about gender issues, this remains confusing to me! Such practices do not exist in some metropolitan cities outside our state and definitely not a scene in other parts of the world. I prefer the front passenger seat filled first while I drive to have a sense of company during the trip, no matter how short or long the distance is or who travels with me.

Having said that, it is equally difficult to ask our male friend or colleague - who drives - as to where we should sit. That puts both in embarrassment. What if I ask my male friend/colleague to occupy the front seat while I drive and he is reluctant. Again a delicate situation. And what if the woman is unwilling to take the seat despite offered by her male friend? He might feel awkward!

OMG, this discussion is a total chaos and confusing!!!! Instead I should let it go with the flow to save my brain drain! ЁЯШО

Thursday, September 9, 2021

Is a child-friendly library possible? ЁЯШР YES! ЁЯШК

As a kid I used to visit district library in Kanchipuram with my father. He was fond of Tamil fiction and I would just see around not knowing what to pick. Sometimes my father helped, rarely the librarian (because only rarely I sought his help) and many a times I found myself lost there. Do I have to read dailies or comics or real big ones or the smallest book of all? I did not know then!!! Mobile libraries gave me the same feel at that age but was fun to see books moving around my neighbourhood!

                            Courtesy: WEF

In my experience, physical structure of the library was not attractive at all in the first place. The reading space was neither airy or broad. It took a while (read as many years) to realize that "what is important in a library is the books and not these spatial items." Secondly, I was never taught how to approach a library. When I say how to approach, I do not mean that libraries are places to be approached in a defined professional way. Being an amateur in browsing will land us in real good books sometimes. But I haven't been taught anything at all about a library tour. The library that was existing in my school was never opened for students. I am sure none of you would be shocked to know that as this is common in our schools - be it government, aided or private. In colleges & universities, we would be taught (at least I was taught) to visit library as buying recommended subject books would be highly unaffordable to many of us (me). 

                           Source: Tamil Nadu Foundation

To mention a few libraries that I frequently visited, the infamous Connemara library surprised me with the number of books and the fact that it is a National Depository Library (meaning a copy of anything published in India is received here by default). Isn't this an awesome thing!!!!! Then the British Council Library in Chennai that is purely posh and I had always felt inferior to go as it seemed to be a 7-star hotel where I would never fit in by any means. I could not recall any relevant literature I had borrowed as I had never felt at home there. Oh then the only library in Tamil Nadu with the highest level of security, the American Library in Chennai situated in the consulate campus. To enter is a challenge in itself as you need to pass through several levels of security checks that might frustrate you. Yet, books/articles we get there are worth taking the effort. But I was exposed to all these places and many more only for the sake of research and I do not remember spending hours together in any of them for general reading. In fact, not having memories of long hours in library is something to be ashamed of. By the time most of us understand that library is a treasure filled with magic for life, we would be typical adults for whom unlearning and relearning become difficult.

Having known this secret the next typical thought of an adult is to introduce their kids to library at an young age. Well, I tried doing the same with my daughter. The first visit to a district library was a disaster as we (mom & dad) wanted to get out of the place ourselves. Some reasons include suffocation and poor lighting. Even after fulfilling these basic necessities including toilets, I do not think it is possible to retain kids there even for a while. On wondering what kind of libraries would pull kids in, google showed me some model children libraries across the world. Presenting their images here:











The above pictures show enhanced physical features of libraries for children. The outward appearance is the very first attraction for kids, no matter what we boast of the proverb "Don't judge a book by its cover.' One cannot make a child understand (or there is no need to teach them) that libraries are meant for reading and not playing. To make a child enter and sit/roam around for a while is the biggest challenge and if such uniquely designed structures could do the task, it has to be done immaterial of investment. 

Though the Anna Centenary Library in Tamil Nadu's capital city has a good children section, it is nothing but a baby step. As children are fond of playing and only playing, children section of libraries need to be playful, attractive and interactive enough to pull them inside. It is said that the job well begun is half done! The reading part will take care of itself once children hang around and love hanging around in a library of their kind.  Below are pictures of library existing in our state. There are not many of this kind, unfortunately.



Be it a school or a public library, minimum requirements or tiny changes that will not cost much include keeping libraries open, an independent children section, bright coloured walls, accessible & low-lying book shelves, few play items, colourful books, enough air and light, kutty kutty incentives, child-friendly furniture/space to sit/lie down, freedom to act on their own and a child enthusiast (you call them a librarian, no problem). 

If you google, you will find a handful of unique libraries in the world doing innovative things such as paying kids for books they read, delivering books using exciting modes of transport, etc. It is okay if we could do nothing unique or innovative of that sorts but we cannot shy away from the duty of bringing kids to libraries. To depend on government is the reliable path to get things revamped. Yet seeking help from stakeholders would prove fruitful for both schools and public libraries as many stakeholders are willing to work in unison. 

P.S.: Yep, I have not told anything about having one at home because It is too personal to intrude into! ЁЯШД

Thursday, September 2, 2021

A stupendous beginning to end something odd!

Today's (02.09.2021) The Hindu well drew my attention and planted a huge smile on face with one of its fine pieces in the very first page. It is ЁЯСЗ

                        source: The Hindu (02.09.2021)

This culture of addressing others as 'sir' and 'madam' has long faded away from most of the countries in the world. May be it did not exist at all in many parts of the world. In particular, it is always fascinating for me while watching English movies and series to see people addressing each other by names in educational institutions & workplaces - irrespective of age difference &  designation. It looks highly professional, indeed! ЁЯЩМ

Whereas in India, the instance mentioned above seems to be the first of its kind. The origin of this kind of salutation in Indiawhich is now immaterial,  is dated back to colonial days! What is needed is to get rid of it. Though it looks extremely difficult, it certainly is not unachievable. The ray of hope is now seeded by this Panchayat office in Kerala that has made the reform by means of displaying boards with names and designation to make it easy for public to address the officials. The office suggests other ways to address officials just in case they find this new move too odd to get adapted to. Interestingly, the news article also states that the choice of words in letters is also undergoing a massive change and experts in vernacular language are working on identifying alternatives, on 'desire' (not request). This is nothing less than awesome for the kind of new professional set up it gives to the office. Reforms at such grassroot level stay stronger and grow healthier! ЁЯЩЗ Kudos!!!!

Nonetheless, just the imagination of bringing such a reform in a smaller unit around gives a mixed feeling, the dominant one being 'not positive'. This long existing culture is difficult to be separated as majority perceive this as a symbol of dominance, authority, ego, position, respect and what not! As long as we cling to these, the chances of change are meagre. Yet, when a place where most of the visitors are from rural areas could make a difference to work culture, isn't easier to do so in an educated environment? Yes, only when it begins from top of the hierarchy. 


I am here reminded of a scene from the Tamil movie Ratchasi where the school Principal encourages students to call her by name and children doing so. Many of us would have felt it being overboard (to be honest, I found it artificial and forced), but it seems to be a good beginning for a better work culture and professionalism. 

P.S.: After having stepped into a conventional  work setup, my habit of calling people by names has changed drastically. I find myself  overusing 'sir' & 'madam' which is abnormally elevated. Let me see if I could change myself for good! ЁЯСР